Being from Mexico has its benefits, I’ve been celebrating mother’s day since Friday! Unlike celebrating on the second weekend of May in the US, in Mexico is customary to always celebrate on May 10th., no matter what day it falls on. This day is a special one for me as I would have celebrated my mom’s birthday on the same day. She would have been 79 on Friday.
It’s wonderful to see all the appreciation moms get on this weekend! My Pastor prayed for all the mothers at our church yesterday and said something that made me think about my mom: “a mother’s prayer is for her children to follow the will of God”. This would have been her request if any of my siblings would have asked her “Mom, what would you like me to get you for mother’s day?”. I’m blessed to know her prayers still reach us all and future generations.
I came across several beautiful postings on social media featuring sons and daughters hugging their mom, families having fun, selfies, moms holding flowers and gifts, poems, and much more. However, there was a posting that caught my attention. It was from my friend, Teresa Scanlan and it said the following:
“For the one who has lost a MOTHER, for the MOTHER who has lost a child, or the one who longs to be a MOTHER… You are not forgotten this Mother’s Day”
It made me think of some people that, like me, lost their mother, whether it was recently or a long time ago. It made me think of people I know in my family and circle of friends who experienced the terrible pain of losing a child, and it definitely made me think of some women I know that have been wanting to experience motherhood and have not been able to conceive or find the right person to start a family.
I’d like to share the stories of 3 amazing women that have experienced one of these situations. I hope their courage and strength inspire someone reading this post.
I’ll call my first friend Estrella. I met her a few years ago during a women’s breakfast where I was a guest speaker. She was one of the most positive and happiest women I’ve ever encountered. She came to me after the event and said “Norma, my mom loved the poem you read and I was wondering if I can get a copy of it”. This may seem like a simple thing with little meaning, but I knew exactly why she was asking me for it and we connected immediately because of it. I could tell there wasn’t anything Estrella would not do for her mom whether it was to ask a complete stranger for something her mom desired, take her places her mom wanted to go to or change her busy schedule around to do something to help her. Estrella’s mom recently passed away and it’s been a very difficult transition for my friend. I admire Estrella because she honored her mom in every aspect of her life and their special relationship reminded me of the strong connection I had with mine. Estrella will find peace to know her mom is resting and her prayers will continue to cover her forever.
The next story is of a mother I haven’t physically met. I met her son, Mike, during one of my JMT trainings in Florida in February 2018. Wally and I met him through a close friend and Mike immediately expressed a longing to have a relationship like we have been able to accomplished. He seemed fascinated of the fact that Wally and I had been together more than 30 years! We shared with him our struggles and victories as a couple and suggested a few action steps for him to take back home and apply to strenghten his family. We continued to stay connected and encouraged him. For some strange reason I had a deep burden for him and often uplifted him in prayers. A few weeks later, our friend who introduced us to Mike gave us the devastating news. He was found death in his apartment and I suddenly understood the burden I had. It was as if I sensed his pain and things he had been going through but I couldn’t even imagine the pain his children, wife and especially his mom were experiencing. Many of us that met Mike stayed close to his mom and offered encouragement and prayer. This was part of her message just a few days after Mike’s death: “…to give you an idea about how I’m doing, I have to be honest. I am very dizzy when I walk, run into everything, I am numb. No smiling, no crying (unless I see someone), no talking, and a sincere dread of being with people, regardless of who they are. I don’t know who I am anymore, but I know it will get better. Until then, I am lost. However, to quote my pastor, ” I don’t know what my future holds, but I know Who holds it”. Even though I never met Mike’s mom, I still pray for her and the family. My admiration for her is bigger now because I see the source of her strength and He is faithful to provide any of us the peace needed even in the most painful circumstances of our lives. I quote this from a recent post on her social media “No rule book. No time frame. No judgement. Grief is as individual as a fingerprint. Do what is right for your soul ‘THE ONLY PEOPLE WHO THINK THERE’S A TIME LIMIT FOR GRIEF, HAVE NEVER LOST A PIECE OF THEIR HEART…TAKE ALL THE TIME YOU NEED”
The last story is of a friend who longs to be a mom. I’ll call her Sophia. Sophia is a beautiful, successful, hard working woman who just turned 41. She’s been engaged in the past but has not found the right husband to start a family with. One might ask “why is a beautiful, successful, hard working woman not in a stable relationship yet? It could be a number of factors and my most honest answer is I DON’T KNOW! Are men intimidated? Most men at this age group are either married or not looking to settle. I mean, everyone (of my single friends) I introduce her to, falls in love with her. However, she’s not one to date for the wrong reasons. She, like many other women in her age are losing hope to find a good husband and start a family. I’ admire her because she’s looking for options and trusting God to fulfill the desires of her heart. I’ve cried with her, laughed with her and prayed with her to know “motherhood” whether its from carrying a baby in her womb one day or other means like adopting a child which I know will provide just as much fulfillment. I praise all women but especially moms like mine who are leaving an amazing legacy to this generation and future generations. Let’s celebrate all moms but more importantly, let’s celebrate all women!